


Real or Delusion

by jaimistoryteller



Series: 2018 January Flash Fics [14]
Category: GoldenEye (1995), James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: Angst, Hopeful Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-01
Updated: 2018-02-01
Packaged: 2019-03-12 03:17:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13538541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaimistoryteller/pseuds/jaimistoryteller
Summary: He’s not sure if what’s happening is real or a delusion





	Real or Delusion

**Author's Note:**

> **Prompt:** “I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice.”

Alec’s POV

He did the right thing, trading himself for James. His friend can go back to Q. They’ll finally figure their shit out. He closes his eyes, repeating that in his mind. He refuses to kill himself. While he’s well aware he’ll probably end up tortured, it doesn’t matter. Not when he’s done the right thing. He’s quite certain that they won’t find him in time if they even bother trying.

They won’t win. Even though they have him and he refuses to commit suicide, they still aren’t going to get what they want. He’s been able to dissociate himself in the past when being tortured, he can do it again. He barely comes out of his mind. It’s just not safe to.

Most the time he’s kept in a cold, damp cell.

It’s during one of his lucid moments when he’s not in his mind that something completely unexpected happens. The men torturing him hit the ground, holes appearing in their foreheads moment before they crumple.

“It’s alright, I got you,” a familiar voice declares close by but through the pounding of his head so it feels like it's far away.

He snarls when unfamiliar hands touch him.

“I’ve got him,” the familiar voice states coolly.

Relief floods his system when the unfamiliar hands stop touching him.

“I’ve got you,” the familiar voice promises as the rest of his bindings are undone.

He blinks, trying to clear his vision enough to see who it is. There is a part of him certain this is nothing but a hallucination. Pain, starvation, and hypothermia can all cause them.

“Don’t worry Alec, I’ll get you home,” the familiar voice declares, a feathery brush against his jaw drawing his focus. “Just rest.”

After that he zones, a combination of pain and exhaustion.

The next time he comes to, he’s stretched out on a comfortable bed, his injuries have been cleaned and wrapped, and there is an IV in his arm. His immediate reaction is to remove the IV, but he’s not tied down, there are windows and the door is partly open.

Actually, he blinks, looking around slowly. He knows this place. He’s moderately certain it’s Q’s flat. That’s not right, why would he be here rather than in Medical if he was rescued? This is probably just another hallucination.

“You’re an idiot,” that familiar voice informs him as Q walks through the door. “A complete idiot.”

“Why’s that?” he asks, voice rough and scratchy, throat dry and almost itchy.

“Because, you fool, I almost had a lock on his location before you made the exchange, and I had to start over when looking for you,” the boffin informs him, settling on the edge of his bed. “Want an ice chip?”

“Yes,” he rasps.

Carefully, Q picks up a cup, popping the top off and pulling a piece of ice out of it.

There’s something achingly familiar about the way the dark haired man waits for him to open his mouth before lightly setting the piece of ice against his tongue out. It’s like he’s done this before, yet he can’t remember ever having an occasion to do so.

“Originally you were in Medical, but you didn’t take that so well, and they were concerned about keeping you drugged,” Q comments as he closes the lid of the cup and sets it aside. “I sort of overrode what they wanted to do and brought you home with me with the assistance of James, Eve and Bill.” The hacker’s lips curve in the ghost of a smile. “I’m moderately certain the only reason Bill and Eve helped was to make sure I didn’t enlist any of the other troublemakers.”

There is something not being said that probably should be said. If he didn’t feel so damned exhausted, he’d pursue it. Instead he’ll focus on the thing he’s pretty sure is a delusion.

“How?”

“Smart blood for one, pure stubbornness for another, and sheer fury for a third,” Q answers with a shrug, as if this isn’t the first time he asked. “I’m grounded currently. Something about ‘not one of the Double O’s, why in fucks sake did you do that?’”

That sounds like something Mallory would demand.

“Why?” apparently he’s going to broach the topic after all.

The boffin tips his head back, taking a deep breath before meeting his eyes as he answers. “I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I don’t notice. You’re an idiot for an intelligent man.”

How would he have…? It’s like a flash of lightning, he doesn’t even get the entire question fully formed, the cameras.

“Take a nap. We can discuss it when you’re not groggy.” Q suggests with an almost soft smile.

He’d like to argue, but he finds himself falling asleep once more. 

**Author's Note:**

> Publishing schedule, I will update one or two stories on Saturday, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday
> 
> Tumblr about my writing [JaimiStoryTeller](http://jaimistoryteller.tumblr.com/)
> 
> I love reviews, comments, and any other sort of communication, feel free to stop in to say hi
> 
> Thanks to Zephyrfox & SandyWormbook for the betaing.


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